We’re Not Sure What The People Behind These 5 Marketing Disasters Were Smoking

All of buy us things because money is pretty useless unless it’s converted into overpriced stuff…

Marketing disasters

And how else would we know what to throw our wads of cash at, if it wasn’t for advertising and marketing? In your face information about things you never even knew existed, but somehow really really needed.

Advertising gurus and over-qualified marketing execs who come together to figure out exactly how a product will fare in a given market and how much they need to spend to make sure it happens. But even these people are human and flawed, which is the kindest reasoning one can give for these amazingly disastrous marketing campaigns.

Because why wait for your product to disappoint people only after they’ve spent their money on it?

#1 Kurl-On Makes International Icon Malala “Bounce Back”

Remember how Malala was shot in the head by the Taliban and in critical condition all because she wanted to further the cause of female education?

Now, remember Kurl-On and how those mattresses were extra bouncy? Now can you possibly imagine putting those two ideas together?

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It’s one thing to refer to global icons, quite another to refer to them being fatally wounded, bleeding and being miraculously healed by a mattress. Plus, the fact that it came from the people at Ogilvy and Mather threw the ad into a harsh negative light.

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#2 Tata Nano Makes People Feel Cheap

The Tata Nano is tiny and convenient for people who need a car for short distances at a low cost. In fact, when the Nano released, it was repeatedly touted as the cheapest car in India.

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Ratan Tata himself stated that the product was marketed poorly because they kind of forgot the main reason Indians buy a car. Driving is secondary, wowing your neighbours is sacrosanct.

So when India was confronted with a car that sold itself as being cheap, India was not into it at all.

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#3 Pepsi Blue’s Campaign Lit Itself On Fire

Quick, what’s a blue liquid you can think of that’s not mouthwash?

Is it Pepsi Blue? No, it’s kerosene.

Remember kerosene? Ask your mom, it’s definitely somewhere in your house, probably in a dirty Pepsi bottle under the sink.

Which is probably why nobody bought Pepsi blue because not even Shah Rukh Khan combined with the Indian cricket team could convince a nation to buy a liquid that looks like you could light someone on fire with it.

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#4 Special K Told Oversized Women Their Husbands Have Stopped Looking At Them

Full disclosure, most people would kindly describe me as curvy, unkindly as saand.

Which is why when Kellogs Special K put out incredibly sensitive ads depicting a woman whose husband does her the gargantuan favour of looking at her for being skinny, I was a tad upset.

The TVC wasn’t the worst of the bunch, however, it was the print ad that really got tempers flaring with this subtle tagline –

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#5 Clean And Dry V Wash Makes Your Vagina Whiter

Ladies have you seen your vagina lately? Unless you’re super flexible probably not. But you know who has seen it? You partners.

And do you know what they’re thinking? That it’s just not white enough.

The woman in this ad is clearly going through a very tough time with her vagina, which is the only explanation for her looking tragically away into the middle distance.

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But then she gains a whole new confidence by washing her vagina with a special wash.

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Ignore the horrible rash this illustration seems to be suffering from and focus on the fact that this wash claims to help clean and whiten your vagina to a more pleasing colour.

Which is clearly something the world has been waiting for with baited breath. Good job Clean and Dry, good job.

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Posted by

Mehernaz Patel

"Not as funny as she thinks she is..." -Facebook Comment Section

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