5 Ridiculous Pieces Of Technology In Bollywood Movies That Would Never Work in Real Life
Bollywood is weird right? Like movies, in general, are weird. They expect us to believe in extremely unrealistic things. Like aliens, and Ram Gopal Varma’s AAG.
But there are some things that have been firmly established by qualified scientists. Physical laws that our world must follow. Bollywood sees this and then firmly tells it to go f*ck itself. Alas, we’re not here for that. We’re here to take a look at some gems from our own history and wonder how advanced they thought science and technology have gotten by the time their film released.
PS – Hollywood does all of this too, we know. But that’s a list for another day. Also we do not intend to offend, just nitpick For fun…
#1 Aamir Khan’s Transforming Bike In Dhoom 3
Nobody really goes to a Dhoom film expecting a deep introspection of how man related to the technological advancements in the world around him. They go expecting hot men to steal things and preferably have hot women stealing them too.
Because theft and forgery are absolutely okay if your abs look like a Cadbury bar.
But while Dhoom 2 still tried to b a little realistic, Dhoom 3 took it to the next level…of garbage.
Even though people praise Aamir Khan for falling deep into his character and committing to roles, absolutely nobody can defend the decision to have a bike that becomes a floating bike. Because right when Aamir Khan is about to fall into the water, his bike farts out a little float and saves him.
Also, the movie ends with a bang…when two bikes sexily combine to make one bike. That can fly. Great stuff guys.
#2 Koi Mil Gaya’s Om Machine
So NASA has a budget for a reason. Because when you send people into space, you want to make sure you don’t fuck it up. But not everyone can afford this. Some people just want to try stuff out in their own homes.
Like Rakesh Roshan’s machine in Koi…Mil Gaya which calls aliens to earth by repeating the word Om over and over again. And this calls the aliens to earth.
Why Om? Probably because Allahu Akbar has way too many syllables.
Also, can you imagine how pissed off aliens would be if they ended up in Kasauli?
#3 Salman Khan’s Amp-less Electric Guitar
Oh Oh Jaane Jaana is an amazing song with a terrible video. It starts out fine, Kajol is being retarded and Salman Khan is being shirtless on stage. That’s all fine. But it’s when the music starts playing that something truly strange happens.
It takes a minute to notice it. See if you can spot the missing element.
Okay, so I am not a musician. Let’s get that out of the way. But working in events for two years has taught me that a live stage has a lot of speakers, monitors, and amps lying around. A lot. And even though technology has come a long way, electric guitars need an AMP. Unless you’re Salman Khan, in which case your shirtlessness will power your guitar.
Also, none of the instruments here are plugged in. To anything. Anywhere. And this was in 1998. Perhaps we let the jaane jaana go and look for a reliable sound execution team.
#4 Taarzan: The Wonder Car’s Car
Okay, so I will admit that the movie is based on magic. That a dead Ajay Devgn possesses a purple car. Instead of HIS OWN FRIGGING BODY.
But we’ll let that one go. There’s no need to debate whether the plot is stupid or not, it is.
However, the one thing we can’t let go of is the car swimming. Literally swimming.
When he realizes his son is drowning, Ajay Devgn cums into the car.
Then the car swims and goes full Jesus Christ. The ghost is fine, the car’s engine surviving this is not.
#5 Everything From Rudraaksh
Okay, considering Pretentious Movie Reviews already took this on, just enjoy this brief moment from the picture when Bipasha Basu makes a bold declaration.
The law of Heat Flow For example – Without an external agent doing work, heat will always flow from a hotter to a cooler object. Like when ice and champagne are poured onto a shiurtless man in a club.
the difference between the good white brainwaves and the bad black brainwaves.
Or Bipasha Basu’s Iran Man computer, operated by more attractive lady scientists than Tony Stark could possibly imagine.
Or Sanjay Dutt battling Suniel Sheeyy inside a man’s mind to gain control of his out of hand schizophrenia. SCIENCE!
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